NEWS FLASH =



PHONE NUMBER OF NEW WORLD ISNOT DISCONECTED no MORE!!!!!!!!!!

548-1693




=NEWPHONE NUMBER OF NEW WORLD

HOW DO I KNOW


HOW DO I KNOW



HOW DO I KNOW.







other night on Trailer Couch of Sleeping Ouside with me
he say






actualy,




I kind of forget the taste.







I HAVEN'T EATEN EYES LATEY















(=is HOW I know)

LONG time go cONRAD asking me when Crash hapened.

Conrad thank you o much.



Sorry taking so long Conrad.


Exact Crashh ocuring July 12 2006.



Some sense coming earlier though, Walking down aisles at Book Store Job and Beaufiful Paradise Costa Mesa buy groceries.



Going to gym geting Fit.



Beach, Coffee and Library few blocks away.


Everything so close, not even needing Car. So easy pleasant.



Is perfect Life! Even live so close to beach for $500 a month. Like was "meant to be," if I believe in that.



BUT


I born to want Poem More Than Anything though.

No poem, Nothing happening in Life.





TryED to hear My life through the perfectness. aND, I heardsome thing. something Big gonna hapen. it had to open more deeper in Some Way.




= Go to scifi "abyss" where I am good AND BAD?







It May Be.







I changed my name to Rose in May 2006 and askt any Dates to spank me, not knowing xactly why. non sexul! But none could do it hard nough. Kenny Howes tried, he trieded so good. i remember.





I remember saing to him that night of extreme handling, "I think youll have to kill me to realy make your point." Was true!





At the time he went home i was disanpointed thinking "Nothing changd!@"





But everything has changed, and now I see

BRELIVEING ME BEEN TOO LONG!


I KNOW!!!!!!!

NOT LIKE I DONT KNOW I KNOW!!!!!!


very strange racing accident i am having htis month. would not believe.

OK. leaning on back of race car at strip. PARKED car no juice, no one even in it iam thinking. [actualy car is GORGEOU. i m still litle in love with car because of when i raced in it with partner ofbefore, who is= racer k.. fast and easy and classy and roomy and inspiriting car that understand me. ]

talking to FRIEND standing there who is opening corona beer for me cause my hands dirty.


all suden i am dragging on groundf! racer k got inside car without me knowing and take off with metal star on my pants caught on exhaust pipe!!!!!!!!!! and it is like he does not know or care i am dragging at up to 200 mph around strip behind him

very stange.



my trailer got biger. some how.


i do not know how this could ocure.



But feels about 15 3/4 inches wider.



i do not know how everyting feeling so open and easy now. not all tight like before. more just normal




is true, life so bigger from power of gasoline as previously said below.




=IS true!!!!!




so big i thinking, "I AM TOO BIG FOR TRAILER. I AM LIFE SO BIG!”



well. i tell you this trailer, lots of storage space. 27 ft Long, SLEEP SIX! storage space even in the floors. =Built In

3 years = still finding new storage spaces in this trailer.oh so much BIGER on the inside than it look on the outside!


but never underestimate the ability of a Trailer to Grow

IS another Great racer,

IS beatiful Wilma Elizabeth McDaniel, picture HERE



went to funeral
in Tulare California yesterday, and glad (though still not 100% sure if she is realy is dead)





had HUGEcircuit, for racer who done it from home. MANY fans. During tributations, Writer of this book calling her and merle Haggard "only two bards of california okie heritage' in fact!

Shwe Brought God to these races without anouncement. strange enough, born 3days before christmas died 5 days after easter. called "lay franciscan" also. Once askt me "I don't want my saints perfect. Thatd be boring, don't you think?


Don't you?"



Wanted answer! I must have thought was too complicated at the time (probly aspiring Boring Saint mysef), don't think i gave a real anser.


SHOULD HAVE!


"remarkbly well adjusted for spinster poet."she thought she was. On a postcard she stuck in one of her books she gave me, she sayd:




Sometimes
an other fool
will see
what I see in
a poem





gonA take a long time to teach methat she is gone

sister wracer IS SO FAST!!!!!

SMELL SO GOOD OUTSIDE!!!!! SMELL THE BEST


=

NEW LEMON TREE

JASMIN

ROSES!!!!!!!''

SMEELLLS THE BEST!!!!!!!

Is power of gasoline, to make my life geting biger!


I can FELE IT! POWER OF GASOLINE!


BUT,GASOLINE MAKE IT =TOO BIG FOR TRAILER!!!!!!!





IF YOU LLOOKIN FOR "ROOM MATE" OR KNOW SOME BODY LOOKIN FOR "ROOM""MATE",




PLEASE BE TELLING ME!!!!!

beautiful morning this morning

EVERYBODY HAS STORY OK!!!!!!


MY GRAMA WAS GREAT RACER. WITH GREAT INJURIES. WAS IN PAPERS FROM VEGAS TO OMAHA


SOOOOOOO LONG, I WANT TO BE JUST LIKE AS HER!


FINALY! GOT SOME INJURIES! (NOT AS GOOD AS HERS, BUT STILL, I FEEL SPECIAL AND PROUD!)




TODAY THOUGH FOR FUN OF IT I WANTED TO SMILE ALL THE WAY. ALONE DRIVING HOME FROM “L.A.”


I TRY AND I TRY.


BUT TURNS OUT



= I CANOT SMILE ALL THE WAY WITH SUCH GOOD PROBLEMS!




AT THIS MOMENT ROLLED DOWN SQUEAKY 1984 CAMRY WINDOW AND THROW PROBLEMS ONTO 605 FREEWAY


LUCKY NO COPS AROUND


NOW AM HAVING NEW COURAGE =NOT TO HAVE PROBLEMS AND TO SMILE


ALL THE WAY


IT COME FROM NO ONE AT ALL

GRANDMA GONA BE DIFERENT KIND OF RACER FROM YOU.

hurted right shoulder racing over sister fence to unlock gate in AUGUST

STILL HURT donot know why or what is wrong


new insuranance Doc Bernard Reimer of flag pins and yellow ribbons come in look me up and down like a boyfrend (????) then slow pulling my shirt shoulder down saying no MRI needed, canot be fixed, will not prescribe even SLING, litle lady, we just gonna Shoot Cortisone I got needle right here!




I SAY Doc Bernard Reimer, you got no IDEA how to support the troops!!!!!


= am going lefthanded wiht sling bought by SELF TODAY. not so hard, my left hand just more angry than the right. good thing doc Bernard Reimer not here haha!

went to poetrey races last night!




SOOOOOOOOOO out of practiceing!!!!!!!!!




been on "detox" plan" for apprx 42 days!!!!! is NO MEAT NO MILK NO CHEESE NOT EVEN BEANS OKAY!!!!!


IS HARD!!!! been wanting to stop but not 100% sure if is right!



suposed to make you race faster. But after actual poetry races of last night, PRETTY SURE IS JUST THE OPPOSITE!!!!!



YES





"BRING ON" THE TOXICSS!!!!!!!!!!!

HELP! trying to be pulling "head" "out of" "ass"~~~~!!!


world is helping!!!!! world is

HERE ARE THANKSFULS ARE TODAY!

1. today starting "80 HOUR PER PAYPERIOD"!!!!! meanS "full time", GOOD for crerdit care DEBT AND BETTER LIVING IN 21ST CENTURY!

2. RACE CAR ENGINE REPLACEMENT, GOING MUCH FASTER THAN EVER!

3. STILL HAVE HEALTH and GOODLOOKS HAHA!

more things you can give to me!


OK:

"Louis Armstrong music" and pictures!

old blankets for covering race car seats




You never told me your top things! Please be telling me.

SUDEN CHANGING EVENTS


RACE CAR ENGINE REBUILD



= TODAY!!!!!!!!



GONNA GO SOMUCH FASTERR!!!!!!!!

Here is a good idea.



we should give each other things. but NOT "special occasion" or trade. ONLY if we really feel like it. like oif you gonna give to someone and they already giving to you you have to wait after they giving you before you can give them, maybe like six weeks (?)(not 100% sure about this what do you think.)


here are the top things you can give me, but only if you realay feel like it:




Race Tickets Of course!
dirt
wig (is "Fun!")
musics of band caled "T Rex music" is such good musics!
Battery Charging Machine.
Pots For Plants
Paint For Walls (Any Color)




Please tell me your top things

1. OK MISTER PICTURE MAN OF COMENTS!





(Pretty sure you are a man. ?)




OK if youare,, Pretend you are at Beauty Contest of "MISS UNIVERSE" with camera ok. (Even "Gay Man" like Miss Universe Contest right.)





Maybe you are thinking at Miss Universe Contest , "How Amazing life to let me see so much Beauty." Or even just, "how the hell did I get these tickets???"





3 May Be you start to take pics cause some guy asking you to. But maybe every single second of All-Day Competition is such Beauty= taking pics gonna take all your time! And Eyes give up on Having Fun after first few mins squinting into camera.






4. Then you notice how many countries there are in the Universe. All are important





5. Maybe you look at photos in camera so far + feel GUILTY toward Beauty & Universe not to photography GOOD ENOUGH! Maybe finally decide dont even GIVE A DAM if anyone else sees the Power and Beauty of the Universe. Is more thatn you ever seen in one place in whole life & just watching today,= IS ALL!









7. Maybe this is not how you would feel at Miss Universe Contest but anyway this is how I felt about Hot Rods on Saturday.








WHO are you anyway

I HAVE MANY THINGS TO SAY ABOUT WHY NOT TAKE PICS AT RACES (SEE COMENT!). BUT MUST THINK OF THEM FIRST!

wish i was Hot Rod of NHRA!!!! '65 mustang going, 300 mph!!!!

top reasons:


1. Beauty! Not sure how but Every Hot Rod Car GOGEOUS when even not the shiny kind and every one is Different from the Others. "Damn"


2. Excitment! 300+ mph, start racing on hind legs, wheels set ground on fire, pooping flammable, parachuting at end, commmentaor you hear but not see etc.


b3. Engine on the outside, seems good



4. don;t know about you but sometimes my life has "NAGGING FUCK OF IT ALL" type of feeling. Things regret, wory about , etc




Do you know the people who lean against the chain link fence ground level to get close as they can to Hot Rods going 300 mph?



Pretty sure = Nagging Fuck of It All put them there.



True = Hot Rods going 312 mph 100 feet away from nagging fucks gonna BLAST them right off! Even with Earplugs! "Vibrations alone" do Major Damage to Naggine Fuck, at least for awhile.





5. I want to do that for people.

UPDATE: POOMONA WINNTER NATIONALS NEXT WEEEKND~!!!!!!

I AM LUCK Y OR WHAT GUYS

REPORT IS:trying to be LIFE "GOOD"!!!!!

MANY WONFERULLEARNINGS FROM COACH AND OTHER TRUE HEARTD RACERS!

Coach say Always Follow "INNTUITION" (not knowing lot about that but WILLING TO LEARN!)

Say: ABOVE 200 MPH, SPEED OF CAR AND THE INTUITION OF DRIVER are SAME THING."



Still do not understand that statement! DEEP, man!




(I just say: GO!!!!!)

Even Now,




Miss racer k energy and skin!!!!



OH "NAGGING FUCK" OF ITALL!

gone to Hospital HabingtatHumanity Oriendation Day today,


= is ALL OVER for me and "SAN JAN"




=Am not NEEDY nough !




to Orientation Ladies of Earth Tones and Perfect Spanish Prononoucings and just wanting to "Include everyones"





i have needs too







you have no idea

EVER SINCE Special Chrismas hostpital Office Lunch Party of last year, seem like always thinkin about SAN JAN CAPSTRno!!!




always thinkin bout san jan capstrano!!!!!



today Work "E" MAIL saying
'Habnitat for Humamity" (?) come to MY OFFICE TOMORROW gonna sign me Up to get my HOUSE BUILD of SAN JAN CAPISTRANO!!!!!




wAIT FOR ME, I am coming san jan capstrano!!!!!!




[do "swallows" really "return to" ? WILL BE FINDING OUT!!!!!]

Am haveing to say, I want to know racer K.






Oh, is a poem.

Come on, Is time for starting of BANNNNDDDDD!!!!





So far is just me, but when other people joining gonna ROCK IT OUT!!!!!!!




Band name Is from email just came from Friendly Dating Service, is called




= "Hottest Local Christians'



Canno t tell me is not Great Mane !


Come on along ang join the Band!!!!!!!


So far have one guitar only so be bringing instrument to first Rock Music Practice Session of I will tell you when! Do you have a banjo. We do "covers song" too so bring of some rockers! I likw to sing harmony! What do you think!





here is top 4 of my wanting of "covers songs" right now :



is "TAMBOURINE" of "Prince Music,"

"Brand New Key" by "Melanie,"

"fire" of "Bruce The Boss ,"

also "Hollywood Bulevard" song of "Kinks!" and

"PLEASE DONt BE GENTLE WITH ME" of Minute Msn, It May Be even best song ever ok!















just wake me up and tug my hair
and let me know
all the outside of the world and you are there
and never be too gentle with me














We could do a million songs

is by Jaymie Pinkston and is HOW I FEEL SOMETIMES!

my trailer park is mostly Old People and Children



= "packing it in" EARLYnround here. (exceot me of course!)



almost 12 othernight come back frome the dumsters i am hearing . through open window in trailer next door,





= is betany?




i go to other side of their trailer near Front Door and am seeing in in Addon Window. she kneeling at jonathan bed in dark when he asleep on Fold Out CouchBed near Christmas Tree. her face wet of tears reflect and braces too. looking like she PRAYING with hands in Church Position.






she saying a lot of stuff i could not hear. i want to knock on Window and catch her eye but would wake up her father. i go to back inside of my trailer try to send Gold To her through the blinds.

Physical Fit is New "Must" of year 2007!!!



other night am runing (!),


in COLD Dark Blue Of Costa Mesa Nights





go 12 minutes, = IT IS HARD!!!!





BUT am "pace it" as PHysical Fitness Magazine is recomending on newport bulevard






When a Old Man With Army Hat coming fasst in a Wheelchair over curb towd me,









And he saying Yes loud! to my running!



and he pop a Wheelie!



and that is All He Say!,



And he Keep Going not looking back to me!


first TIME I am running 30 minutes all the way home not even stoping!
and i am \never before undersdtanindg until now what this Cold Unfrendly Air was for

today coworker is taken pictures of, hm, ME!!!!!

did not want to because of feel litle low but surpise are ok "pics"

I am thinking so!





i like my hair!





2007 decided going to be Good!


how can not with this hair?

truth is,

not feel so "hot"

truth is,

am "weakling"

truth is a 10 year old girl and her mom subletted my trailer this sumer
she was born with her heart going other direction from most people and all internal organs on oposite side, "inoperable."
she looked normal. had blonde hair so THICK her mom had to change my showerhead. she was very down to earth compared to her mom. they came from florida for a skateboard camp for kids with birth defects and I almost got kicked out of the park for it.

i realy could relate to that little girl

is almost CHIS MAS TIME!!!!!!!!!


=
Very Exciting






1. birthday of Baby That Give People Advice (Baby, Stroll Over Here! I Am Ready For the Magic Baby Advice!)



2. Pretend Is Snowing (I am not 100% ssure why to do this, but seem fun ok!),


3. Presents from Man You Can Not See (Do NOT Like! VERY Frustrating!! From what I heara Mr. Santa Man my type too, and I avaibable. "WHATEVER"!)


4. CANDY of Wait Until Morning (see #3, 'FUCK THAT'!!!!)


5. "Silent Nigth" is the song ok. And is true, ALWAYS a SILENT NIGHT on Christmas Night. Even with no snow in dumb old beach of Orange County, USA, is a Silent Night! Not sure why is World so serious. Wasnt Jesus kind of party guy. "Whatever" (see #3)




6. Come to think, even so exciting, so far am only giving CHRISTMAS GRADE OF "B". Jesus needing beter atendance record. He is briliant but lazy

coweorker LETITICIA =24. she studying to be a LPN, so knowing Medical Terminology and Coding very good! Her boyfriend ELI in Marine Core in IRAQ. He is 22. She showing us pictures with airplane headphones on and lying on a weird cot. She say he is Elsaldoran but me he looking like he from India. She talking about him LALL THE TIME and text mesage throughout day when eli not ON A MISSION. She calling hersself a "grandma"" because she dont go to movies, just WAITing FOR ELI TO COME HOME.

I askt how was her weekend was & she say they talk on compputer yesterday 3 hours, "sick horny bastard" she cal lhim. I am liking! Thinking, very good!

Then she ask me for a box size of "Baby Wipes container." I am looking for box under my desk etc. I say, hm, why Baby Wipes container?


= sending Eli Baby Wips?

she look like Shirley Temple getting caught of something



say he doesn't like to use toilet paper when he goes to the restroom

its too rough



"STRIKE THE RECORD"+++
!!!!!not just likeing ==I AM LOVING!!!!!!!!!you got me RIGHT HERE

Litle girl next trailer to me is 10. name BETANY



VERY SMART

(has braces = must be SMART! )



VERY BOSSY OF BROTHER JONATHAN who is 8. She always upset with him not doing things right. She always "screetching" and upset about EVERYTHING. Her Father saying "borderline personality" (????) and maybe needing Medications. I think Father is a little wierd. Weird mustache i am not liking! He putting her in Acting Class becaus of overactive imagination for now though and see how it goes.


When am hearing betany with Jonathan I CAN UNDERSTAND her. We the same, like we responsible for something not knoing what & cannot smile TIL everything is PERFECT.




Betany: Jonathan fake vomit pile on your pilow actualy mean = try to makea you SMILE!!!!













(betany he loving you so much)

CRASHHing from "Greatness wednesday"


haha, joke is on me =

know what, figured out



"strange enough"",



= AM GREAT!q!!!!!!





DOingg MY BEST ALL THE TIME in DARKNES and as HUMAN PERSON OF IMPERFECT!!!





TRIED TO BE SMART!!!




AM NOT SMART!!!




am, GRAET!

Going back to Poetry Class next Sesion at Conmunity Center. Working on one now, asking many for comets on how to improve.

Ok "here goes"




life suck
but is a beautiful morning:
how does that work?

now under racecar, fixing,
see sky from angle
I did not before

palm trees theyt say come from Australia
seem starting to get used to this place,
almost to fit in

my trailer park is full of old people,
they drink & play a card game i dont understand in a secret room by the Laundry in the afternoons
they are trying to have a good time
I like that part of them

there, its the laundry smell,
someone is doing.
how can it be that
god didnt think of all the best smells,
peeople did some too?

but is true!

life suck
but is beautiful morning

i pray for some morning, for him to know
that if he had ful story
he wouldnt feel bad
he been hurt before and somehow come through
clean
i never evereverever want to mess with that

i pray some morning he will know

nothing like that Ever happen to me before



my eyes were Too Young

to spot the Trick being played


WITH poor schizophrenic
poet boy Gods made
propose of marriage to me
on sumer vacation, far from racer K

knowing

how much I wanted to talk to them


did not believe i could just hang with Someone
thought I had to do Harder Unnatural things
for Gods who are not even nice to me


racer k sees good things and brings them out more he
wants your strength

so i am trying to be strong

the 4 days that poor sick child was here
was a surgery on me
took a week to recover
but now Eyes Transplant is complete
& can not look at Life the same



once racer k said i wasn't good enoough for him
later apologize like a flowerbud that open but stil
like a child
i wanted to get back at him
and made Greatest mistake of all,

on World Wide Web


should have waitedtil my eyes adjusted to the light

& it may be true, not good enough for racer k




but now it ring through all my silly lifetimes at once:


fuck not saying what is going on inside you for 3
months to someone you care for !


fuck mariage proposals from Gay Schizo Boy after 2
days of knowing!


FUCK THE GODDS!!!! in they cold stoney asssses!!!


fuck that!!!






racer k was
someone
i could relate to



one more twist of the wrench,
i pray
may be this race car wil be better than yesterday

COUNTING OF BLESING TIME OK


heavy heart but

myst say, LIFE BETTER NOW THAN OF ONE YEAR AGO!!!!!


# 1. MORE MOENY!!!!! = "HIGH FIVE ALL AROUND "!


Boss is Boss of Paramedics = Dream of use Race Skills to Become Paramedic and Save Lives, gets me through day!



#2. NOW, LIKe LORD,, can rest ON SUNDAY!!!!


\
#3 NEW DESK, BEST EVERRRRR = "solid LEGIT" as kids of today are SAYing! hold whole shed of notebooks & trailer still stand ok!



4. thanks of cola drinks and junk foods, which they can bring you back to LIFE.


5. new race COACH 2 p.m. SATURDAYS.


6. TRIPOD STAND NOW HOLD TRAILER IN PLACE beter SO DONT WOBLE SO MUCH!!!! Big deal around here!


7. SOLID FAMILY LIFE. father and mother and sister and brother, must say beter than EVER in geting along, they race too so understanding each other.

8. dogs still like me despite hrecent horible events

MUST TO STOP BEING soooo SADDD AND anxiety and START of BEING THANKFILLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!




LONG LIST OF THANKSFULLS COMING, STILL WORKING ON!!!!!

BIG PROBLEMS!!!!

HURT REAL BAD!!!

TAKESS EVERYTHING GOT TO KEEP DRIVING TO HOSTPITAL NO SHORTCUT ASIGHT

BEST BOOK EVERR in LAUNDRY ROOOM!!!!!


is "'WHERE TO FIND GOLD IN SOUTHERN CALIFNORNIA"!!!


is by JAMES KLEIN! Part time actor and FULL TIME GOLD FINDER!



Says:

Ask any old prospector where the best place to search for gold is and, more than likely, he will tell you, "Gold is where you find it." After you have been prospecting for a while, you will find that no truer words were ever spoken. You can find gold in many places in Southern California. This book will show you where and how, in addition to giving you leads on finding a lost treasure as well.

!!!!!


ALSO:

After several years of mining, I found a lost gold mine. A professional geologist and a licensed state of California assay laboratory have estimated that my mine contains SEVERAL MILLION DOLLARS IN GOLD AND SILVER.!!!!!!


(((emphasiS MINE!!!)



Book shows where gold IS in suburbs including NEWHALL, VLENCIA, SAN GABRIEL VALLY anfd San Juan Capistrano!



JAMES I GOT THE EQUINPEMTN YOU RECONMEND and ear to ground!!!

as is said on circuit you do not ask a teenager dvice about LIFE or a rookie racedriver how to getahead in line!!!!

ASKT OLDEST DRVIER in my TOWN, jOHN dOLLREICHS, possibly 60!, BEFORE HE eft for south carolina races worlds in sumer, for parting wordsof wizdom he said


I go with the flow


and then he went with flow to land of fassst aligators.


but what does thjs mean to "go with flow"????

veryunknown idea to m,e, is this another "metaphor"? i only know lava flow~


ACTALLY, COME TO THINK, after last months my advice is, donot to follow ANY advice! not even Greek Goodesss, even if she promises!

!!!IF IS ADVICE = DO NOT FOLLOW!!!!!

Coworker SO OBNOXIS!!! after BIG FIGHT of before she ask me to advtze for her new old whatever blog!

"GET LIFE LAREADY!!!!""""

My coworkedr and I had BIG FIGHT. DOnt let her tel you not!

Lava goes how it flows, Canot MAKE a misteaks!

So, I f you makea mysteak, thank you VERY MUCH! Jusst remember, "WELL DONE" and PLENTY FAT!

GP, oldest and craftiest desert racer i have nown, also my ggrandmother, yesterdy morning left tuscon for wilder circuits.

oH GRAMA,

i love you before and after. thank you for teaching me to type and ply cards and be alone. thank you for Truth and Chaos of dustcloud behind your wheels of where ia m lost now. yor disgust for my stentimentals. these words not good enof but your legend wil never die on this circuit

new sfrom tucscon = GP ASTILL ALIVE!!!!!

(GP, oldest and tuffest desert racer that is known for miles, also MY GRNADMOTHER.) Had galblader removal opernation and then docors removed Ventirlator Machine saying "4 DAYS TO LIVE" withut machine.

HA!

Has happwened before. broke neck in racing crash years ago, doctors left her overnight for dead on metal table in Midas Nevada ER, next morning she is asking from metal table for her coffee.

later cured self of cancer when docx had pooped out with natural juices and layatril smugled in underwear from "TJ".

4 days to live. 6th day she stil kicking and says GET DAMN BRATS OUT of hospice halls!